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Friday, September 19, 2014

I SAID, "GOD, I AM NOT WORTHY" JESUS CHRIST SAID, "MY DEAR CHILD, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH" (A OPEN HEARTED LETTER TO JESUS CHRIST)



What is man that You are mindful of him, And the son of man that You visit him?” – Psalm 8:4

Lovely Lord, when I see the little daughter that you have given us, the only question that is getting raised in my mind is, “Who am I that You are mindful of me?” There were so many who have no food, shelter, job, studies and good life. You have given me all these. But what I have done for You?

I have did my best to put Your Name to shame in so many ways but yet You lifted me through Your grace whenever I did something wrong. 

I did so many things against You. Actually You are the One who should have left me when I committed those sins. But I could not understand why so many humans hated me and left me all alone. When they did that, I had no qualities to put it in front of them to defend I am good. If I could not do that with ordinary men how could ever I defend myself in front of You, who is so Holy. Though You are the only One I had in my life, I thought you will be the next to leave me. 

To my surprise You had never left me. You stood by my side and through Your amazing grace You loved and lifted me. There were times I prayed to You to punish and kill me but You behaved like You had never heard those prayers. I was looking at my past but You looked at my future for which You has so many plans.

You were my only comfort on those days. All I pleaded to you was death but You carried me softly in Your gentle arms. Slowly You healed all my wounds. So many times I thought about my mistakes and felt ashamed but not even once You spoke to me about my past wrong doings. You had forgiven me through Your blood and You made me to stand for Your glory. You are my comfort and joy.

One fine day, I thought I should not ask You any more blessings because I felt I was not worthy to ask You anything. When my parents started to find a bride for me, I gave everything into your hands and waited for Your will. 

I had no expectations for I know You are the only One who knows what is best for me. Though waiting for two years seems to be a longer period, You gave Your strength to withstand all kinds of temptations. Though at times I hurried to take wrong decisions You stopped me and put me in the right path.

You proved that You are the only One who knows what is best for me and at what time I should get the best by giving me a wonderful wife at Your Own time. Many closed ones came to our marriage and went but You never left us alone. You took the position of Father and to this day You are doing everything for us. 

When troubles and problems came, You were our shelter. When pains and sorrows filled, You were our joy. For the past two years, You were leading and protecting us in Your path with peace and joy.

Many people think that we are a best couple and so only we are having a good marriage life. They might not know that we are having a peaceful marriage life because we have with us the best God who is a best Father and Shepherd.

I never pleaded much for a child to You. But yet my wife cried to You to give a baby soon. You know the thoughts that I had in my mind at that time. One day my wife told me that she is pregnant. I could not believe that at all. Your love and grace was far much beyond my understanding. 

As days progressed many loved ones who prayed for us told that God will give us a son. You know that my desire for several years was to have a girl baby. Once I had a faith that You will give me a girl baby but later I felt that I was not worthy to have one and so I forgot that desire. 

As I heard the news that You have given a child to us, I waited outside the labour ward anxiously. I remember the moment in which my wife’s mother came out carrying a baby in her hands and said to me, “It’s a girl baby.”

You filled my heart with so much joy and happiness. You know that words can never describe my happiness that I had on that moment not just because the baby and my wife were fine but because of Your unending love that You have upon me.

Am I worthy Lord to have such a blessing in my life? What will I do for you for all the things that You have done so far and You are doing till this day? Who am I that You are mindful of me?
As I placed all this questions to you this day, You gave me just one reply. You said, “My Child, I love you so much.”

Thank You so much Jesus for Your love, grace, protection and blessings. I have only one desire: Take my life and use it for Your glory. Let Your light shine through my life. May I carry Your comfort for those who are desperately in need of Your blessing.

 Though I struggle to live a holy life, You know that I love you so much Jesus. From the day I was born to this day You are my comfort, joy and everything. Thanks a lot Jesus for everything and I Love you lots.

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